Updated: Mar 18, 2020
Alright, so I wanted to jump on here and talk to you guys about something that I have only briefly talked about before and that is that I struggle with depression, anxiety, and insomnia. The insomnia is something that I have struggled with since I was a child and have learned to deal with and manage as I have gotten older. My depression and anxiety are things I have dealt with as I have gone through life and all the experiences that I have had, as well.
I wanted to write about this so that others who are feeling the same things can relate and know that things will get better and the sun will rise the next day. In all the things that I have come across in my life I do not think I could've ever predicted that I would have to face a lifelong battle with depression. I will say that I know it started out as a kid because I have been through so many traumas in my life and in the end it just stacks up before you come to realize it and all you want to do is shut out the world. Now that I have reached adulthood I have been through more traumas that I honestly didn't know if I was going to come back from. All the way from leaving my parents house at 18 and learning how to navigate bad relationships and dangerous situations, to dealing with my demons when it came to drinking and drugs and ending up at the end of that journey with a healthy outlook on life and a better grasp on reality and how to navigate through the world with my best friend and partner in crime at my side.
Now, I am not going to sit here and pour out every detail of my sob story because let's be honest it does no good and it is private not just to me, but to all the people who have ever been involved in my life and experiences. One thing I will say though, is that no matter how dark things have gotten for me and trust me that has been very dark, even if I gave up there would always be a part of me that would say what are you doing stop being a coward and face your life head on! Giving up is not something that comes easy to me and to be honest I have never been much of a quitter but I have lost a few battles! In the end I have not lost the war that rages inside me and with the grace of god in my own belief I have been able to move forward and really get out there and keep learning to handle my depression and grow in spite of it.
No matter how dark it has gotten I have somehow found the courage and bravery that I needed to stand up and say “Fuck you life! Your minion depression, hits like a bitch!” I work on it daily! I work out, I try to eat healthy most of the time, I journal, I meditate, I do my best to see the positive in all things, I enjoy the moments I have with the people most important to by putting away my devices or not touching them at all, I look for new things to try, and I look for outlets like this one where I can let out all the things that I feel and want to find common ground with amongst others around the world. I also take breaks from social media and the internet and just watch TV or movies or anime or something or go for a walk or to a museum or something like that. What do you do to help your mental health? What is your story? What do you fight with on a daily basis?
My truth is that I do not have it figured out, and I am in no way an all together person but even if I am a mess I simply try to be better than I was the day before and that means taking it one step at a time and seeing the life I have both good and bad as a blessing. What is your truth? Leave your responses down below in the comments and I will get back to you! Till next time!